And if he asks why god is crying, another cute thing to tell him is, probably because of something you did. Apr 24, 2016 the title says it all this book is simply a collection of deep thoughts from the mind of jack handey, an emmy awardwinner and coproducer of saturday night live, where these thoughts first appeared. A clever, absurd and fantastical adventure that could only have sprung from the hilariousslashlunatic mind of jack handey. Jack handey is an american writer and humorist, best known for his bestselling series of surrealistic one liners and stories, deep thoughts by jack handey.
If i didnt drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Once when i was in hawaii, on the island of kauai, i met a mysterious old stranger. Deep thoughts by jack handey some time back i received by email a collection of deep thoughts by jack handey and put them on this page. Top 30 quotes of jack handey famous quotes and sayings. My favorite saturday night live sketch rolling stone. Its a neat trick to plan an elaborate trick on the first of april and then say april fools for instance i tried this real elaborate proposal that really got my girlfriends hopes up. Deep thoughts by handey, jack, 1949publication date 1992 topics wit and humor, juvenile, american wit and humor. As i bit into the nectarine, it had a crisp juiciness about it that was very pleasurable until i realised it wasnt a nectarine at all, but a. One thing a computer can do that most humans cant is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse. If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, letem go. When she saw the king laughing she let out a big laugh too. Deep thoughts about deep thoughts saturday night live and.
But what was her head doing right by the football like that. Dec 14, 2010 the smell of something was strong in the air as we played whatever sport we played. Deep thoughts by jack handey if a kid asks where rain comes. The stench of honololu are you a fan of books in which famous tourist destinations are repurposed as unlivable hellholes for no particular reason. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. Funny love quotes if your friend is already dead, and being eaten by vultures, i think its okay to feed some bits of your friend to one of the vultures, to teach him to do some tricks. Wed eat some stuff, or not, and then i think we went home.
Deep thoughts by jack handey if a kid asks where rain comes from, i think a cute thing to tell him is, god is crying. Handey won two emmy awards and a writers guild of america award for his. He is a fic tional character created by a fortyfour yearold new york writer whose name, coincidentally, is jack handey. A tropical adventure, written and read by the legendary snl deep thoughts and new yorker writer jack handey. The lost deep thoughts features enormously funny observations, remembrances, hypotheses, and situations in handey s finest style. Nov 03, 2016 if you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, letem go. Jack handey revels in the stench of honolulu deep thoughts by jack handey was an icon of saturday night live in the 1990s. Jack handey quotes quotable quote if youre in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. When gary told me he had found jesus, i thought, yahoo. Please stop the deep thoughts book deep thoughts by jack. Check out all the channels below and see what their jokes for today are, too.
Fans of saturday night live may associate the author with deep thoughts, the subversive. He enjoyed a good laugh and so did his wife, the queen. I recently discovered that these were not the usual anonymous or nearly so jokes that circulate on the net, but were and taken from jack handey s books. If a kid asks where rain comes from, i think a cute. Deep thoughts by jack handey was an icon of saturday night live in the s. If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, forget em, cause, man, theyre gone. Maybe itll make everyone think how stupid war is, and while they are thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them. He has written several humor books, including, most recently, please stop the deep thoughts. There was a time when deep thoughts by jack handy was the only part of snls hour and a half that made me laugh. Delivered over soothing music and serene images, jack handeys. Funny pictures of the day 34 photos famepace got to love jack handy. Rooney claims that handey s deep thoughts were, poetically at least, ahead of their time.
See more ideas about quotes, jack handy quotes and deep thoughts. Jimmy fallon out this month july 16 from hachette audio. Jack handey born february 25, 1949 is an american humorist. Sensuality, jack handey s deep thoughts on sensuality. A national bestselling collection of comedian jack handeys deep thoughts short, funny observations on life that were shown in between sketches on. He has also written for steve martins standup and the new yorker. If a kid asks where rain comes from, i think a cute thing to tell him is, god is crying. We do however want to celebrate the fine work of the distinguished saturday night live writer with this gallery of the thirtyfour.
Deep thoughts by jack handey one thing a computer can do that most humans cant is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse. The legendary deep thoughts and new yorker humorist jack handey is back with his very first novela hilarious, absurd, farflung adventure tale. By kelly conaboy september 22, 2017 thats why you like reading benchley and thurber and stuff like that. One thing i always felt bad about was kicking grandma in the head. Deep thoughts were first seen in small comedy magazine army man comics edited by george meyer and continued in national lampoon in 1984 though gained. Randomness at its fineness simple things to make you smile any day of the week. His other books include the stench of honolulu, what id say to the martians, deeper thoughts, all new, and deepest thoughts. He is best known for his deep thoughts by jack handey, a large body of surrealistic oneliner jokes, as well as his fuzzy memories and my big thick novel shorts, and for his deadpan delivery. Your friends and family love the gift of laughter, give it to them with a quick visit to the official jack handey website jack handey is a brilliant comic and a lovely person who has amassed a legion of fans with his unique brand of comedy. First of all, who knew that jack handey, made infamous by the saturday night live deep thoughts by jack handey bits from 1991 to 1998, was a real guy. Jack handey sometimes when i reflect back on all the beer i drink i feel ashamed.
Please stop the deep thoughts book deep thoughts by jack handey. Oct 22, 2019 deep thoughts by jack handey from old school snl days. It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man. They didnt really write about, you know, the election of 1920, which is gone. The title says it all this book is simply a collection of deep thoughts from the mind of jack handey, an emmy awardwinner and coproducer of saturday night live, where these thoughts first appeared. Jack handey deep thoughts from snl, deep thoughts by jack. Deep thoughts by jack handey really funny clean jokes. A national bestselling collection of comedian jack handey s deep thoughts short, funny observations on life that were shown in between sketches on saturday night live. The recitation section spreadsheets with our record of your scores for course assignments will. Deep thoughts were first seen in small comedy magazine army man comics edited by george meyer and continued in national lampoon in 1984 though gained popularity when they were read on saturday night live beginning in 1991. Im sure there was some great satire about the election of 1920, if that was an election year, but i just prefer.
He cried and cried, but i think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. With quirky, offbeat humor that often veers into the unexpected, jack handey s witty one liners make this book the perfect funny gift for fans of mitch hedberg or for anyone who appreciates a good dad. Apr 24, 2014 deep thoughts by jack handy disneyland rajesh singh. In fact, fact she laughed so hard she broke her throne. And i can picture us attacking that world, because theyd never expect it. Your friends and family love the gift of laughter, give it to them with a quick visit to the official jack handey website. Jack handey is a brilliant comic and a lovely person who has amassed a legion of fans with his unique brand of comedy. Jack handey born 25 february 1949 is an american humorist. Jack handey has contributed to the new yorker since 1987. If you drop your keys into molten lava just let em go cause, man, theyre gone. When i was in the 3rd grade, a bully in school started beating me up every day. Mar 16, 2017 my favorite saturday night live sketch. Handey returns to his more traditional style of humorous deep thoughts in this volume, featuring briefer musings than in his magnum opus, fuzzy memories.
Although many people assume otherwise, handey is a real person, not a pen name or character. Sometimes i worry what kind of a world we are leaving to the bands of roving mutants who will inherit it. Aug 11, 2015 new mexicans are rallying against cruel wildlife management. Aug 12, 2005 what are the best deep thoughts by jack handey, in pattericos opinion.
If youre in a boxing match, try not to let the other guys glove touch you lips, because you dont know where that glove. Now jack handey has written a novel, the stench of. See more ideas about deep thoughts, thoughts and deep thoughts jack handy. Intitulee deep thoughts, by jack handey en francais. He is most famous for his deep thoughts, a large corpus of surrealistic oneliner jokes. I wish there was something called trial by ants, because at the end the guy would say, the ants have spoken. Handey also wrote for saturday night live, which helped bring deep thoughts popularity through their inclusion as interstitial segments. He cried and cried, but i think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. For the uninitiated, deep thoughts was a brilliantly satirical saturday night. Renowned humorist and former saturday night live writer jack handey speaks out against expanded cougar trapping. Deep thoughts by jack handey dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which i guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis. If you know jack handey from the deep thoughts he wrote for saturday night live, you probably think of him as a comedy writer. Funny quotes love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake. I started to drive over to the real disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.
If you ever fall off the sears tower, just go real limp, because maybe youll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy. Lucky for you, we have absolutely no intention of answering your questions. But as kathleen rooney recently explained in the new york times magazine, handey is in fact a groundbreaking contemporary poet. The sequel to deep thoughts, this collection of humorous meditations contains inspirational lunacy from the saturday night live regular. Handy and his deep thoughts collections got what i need. New quotes deep funny humor 17 ideas we all know at. Deep thoughts by jack handy all my favorite quotes. Deep thoughts by jack handey if you drop your keys into molten lava just let em go cause, man, theyre gone.
A way of describing cultural information being shared. My favorite writer of all time is jack handey, and deep thoughts might be my alltime favorite thing ive ever seen on snl. Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself. Deep thoughts by jack handey your friends and family love the gift of laughter, give it to them with a quick visit to the official jack handey website. His other books include the stench of honolulu, what id say to the martians, deeper thoughts, more about jack handey. If youre an archaeologist, i bet its real embarassing to put together a skull from a bunch of ancient bone fragments, but then it turns out its not a skull but just an old driedout potato. If i ever get real rich, i hope im not real mean to poor people, like i am now. May 11, 2015 before there was internet snark way back in the dark ages of the 90s there were deep thoughts by jack handey. Thoughts, by jack handeyon satur day night live, the show for. Jack handey is one of americas favorite humorists, from his new yorker pieces to his deep thoughts books and saturday night live sketches. You may be wondering who is jack handey and is he an infomercial product. Hes a writer who also worked on some very funny snl sketches like a personal favorite of mine unfrozen caveman lawyer and toonces the driving cat.
He is best known for his deep thoughts by jack handey, a large body of surrealistic oneliner. Before there was internet snark way back in the dark ages of the 90s there were deep thoughts by jack handey. Discover and share deep thoughts by jack handey quotes. What are the best deep thoughts by jack handey jokes.
I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without ha. Jack handey deep thoughts from snl, deep thoughts by jack handey. The stench of honolulu written and read by jack handey. Handys absurdist humor touched my funnybone, and my funnybone is a queer little fella. Now, in what id say to the martians, handey regales readers with his incredible wit and wacky musings. If youre in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. Dont ever get your speedometer confused with your clock, like i did once, because the faster you go the later you think you are. Then they got serious when they remembered they had the plague. Whenever i see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. Pattericos pontifications best deep thoughts by jack handey. New mexicans are rallying against cruel wildlife management. He is best known for deep thoughts by jack handey, which appeared on saturday night live.
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